Author: TC

What do a Super Bowl Ring, Brain Cancer and a Dead Puppy have in common?

What do a Super Bowl ring, brain cancer, and a dead puppy have in common? They ALL landed in my week this week. It has been epic. Epic as in amazing and horrible all at the same time. I feel like I have been on the most intense dollar-coaster ride and am ready to get off, and throw up.

This week:

  • Spoke at a work event, shared where my passion for my work comes from and got to try on a Super Bowl Ring.
  • Found out a mom I have been volunteering all year with has inoperable brain tumors, plural. She has been sick all year.
  • Mended a year long rift in a 40-year-old relationship to see if I could get the mom with the brain tumors help…
  • Attended a dinner where I have been selected as a promising leader and will get guidance in how to in rise faster in my chosen career.
  • Helped coordinate a fundraising party with a martial arts instructor who is amazing.
  • Came home, ready to leave for my son’s state competition with my family, only to find in the 8 minutes we were home, our 3-month-old puppy got out, got hit by a car, and died in my nine-year-old son’s arms. We stayed, buried him in a special place on our property, collected ourselves, and left for his competition.
  • Our puppy, RIP.Our puppy, RIP.
  • Attended younger son’s state competition, which his team won, they are off to Globals, and my husband has to leave on a business trip.
  • Tonight we light a lantern for our lost puppy.

What do you take from a week like this? I am thankful when I open my eyes that I am still here, still able to love and care for my family, friends and others. Still here to serve. God isn’t done with me yet.

All I ask now, is to keep giving and serving, as my heart is broken and only time will heal it.

The moment you didn’t realize it would be the last time…

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How many moments in your life do you recognize as the last time you will get to do something? We all seem to assume we will get to do it again. Yet I realize, especially with my kids, that really, every day is the last time. Each day I watch them change and grow, see them become new every morning.

They are the moments when your kids used to need you, that until they don’t one day, you don’t realize, that last time they asked you- would be the last, until afterwards.  These moments are all poignant and beautiful, but so many, we miss.

We notice these most when someone dies, yes dies. I abhors the phrase “passed away,” we ignore death and avoid the topic so much it makes me angry. When someone dies we are forced to see these last moments all at once, because they are over. My goal is to take these moments as they come, recognize as many as I can, and celebrate them. I believe this is why I have fewer regrets than most people I know.

I encourage you to look at today with fresh eyes and recognize, in your own way, what will never pass your way again. Simply take the time to see it and recognize it for what it is.

P.S. My dog is sleeping by the fire…

Why Marilyn never had a muffin-top!

Image

Image from LIFE Magazine

Why Marilyn never had a muffin-top!

The real reason- LOOK- her pants hit at her waistline! This same figure would have had a “muffin-top” if she were forced to wear today’s pants!

Here goes- O.K. world, fashion pet peeve, the “muffin-top”, and not for the reason you are thinking! I have a small muffin-top, however mine is created more, note I said more, by fashion than fat.

Why do I have a muffin top?

I need to do more sit-ups?

(Uh, yes, but that is  beside the point)

Do I am blame it on having kids?       (While they are not the direct cause there is only so much you can do when skin gets stretched!)

FACT: I weigh exactly 4 pound more today than when I graduated from college 21 years ago!

I blame it on the fashion industry for lowering waistlines to a ridiculous place- our hips!

It is called a WAISTline not a HIPline for crying out loud! Almost any woman can create a “muffin-top” on her hips- I challenge any woman with a decent figure to create a “muffin-top” at her WAIST!

Now that the 3-inch zipper trend which created more plumber-butts than the world should ever have been forced to see, the trend seems to be becoming kinder. I am looking forward to having a choice in my waistline- I love hipster pants, but would love to get some which hit a little higher so I wouldn’t have to feel like I am fighting the look of a muffin-top just to keep my pants up!

Fashion industry challenge- just label them honestly- don’t call them “hipster” call them “muffin-top makers” and see how many you sell!

 

Ghosts in my house

Our house is full of many memories, of our mothers, now gone, of joy of a new baby, excitement in finding a place to call ours with a climbing tree!

These memories on some days, feel like Ghosts- here are a few I notice often…

Ghost 1-Image

My mom- though she doesn’t haunt our house in the way people think of ghosts her presence is in so many things. Her influence on me to keep our house neat and tidy so we can live here without effort, her emphasis on tradition and doing things together, dining together. All of these things- and my great-grandmother’s dishes- which my mom always used to say it would upset my great-grandmother more to see them unused than chipped or broken in regular use!

Ghost 2-Image

My mother-in-law, her laugh and joy of reading permeate everything in our house. She loved sharing stories and being with our boys. Some of our favorite furniture pieces are from her home- a blue loveseat which makes me smile every time I look at it and a small side table which she laughed when I told her I used it in a garage sale to put our lemonade stand on- and had more people offer to buy it than anything in the garage sale!

Ghost 3-Image

The layers of our past residing here- from our youngest’s first steps to our eldest’s mural- each is a layer of how we have left our mark on this home. I strive to ensure our memories here have a resting place, a photo album or story written down so we can relive them again and again and add to them as we go. As well as a way to look back on them again when we do move.

While our house may be full of “ghosts” I feel blessed with all we have been able to create here, the parties, the gatherings, the guests, every one a fantastic blessing of being-a placeholder in our memories of the joy we have shared here together so far- may we have many more!

One Year Off

Little did I know at this time last year I would step away from my blog- only to find 318 followers on my return!

We have this image up in our gym, to remind us of the soldiers- the land of the free because of the brave- and to be grateful for the simple things every single day.Spirit of the Green Beret

During the last year I completed my first marathon, got a new business off the ground and reconnected with many precious people in my life.

Today I sit in the sun, with my son, feeling a depth of gratitude it is hard to explain.

In life as in all things, having the right balance is everything. This does not mean everything is evenly balanced, but that whatever stage of imbalance you feel- is where you are supposed to be, and learn.

This weekend we will see old friends, I will visit a friend newly diagnosed with cancer, My eldest is on his first extended trip away from home, and I will write again.

Looking forward to more and grateful for all of you.

As my guide and friend often says, Onward!

 

Arrival

So excited to see this done!

kittycollects

It’s small, it’s cute, it’s only $25, and it’s just in time for Christmas!

My book has arrived, after a year and a half in the making! It’s been a long time coming, and so much has happened in the meantime. Whilst there have been many ups and downs, I’m pleased to say that my first foray into the world of published books is now available at all good bookstores! (how’s that for a sales pitch?)

A little bit about the book:

Recycled Chic is for those who aren’t content to look like everyone else. It both inspires and instructs on ways of recycling, renewing, and reinventing pre-loved fashion and fabrics. Featuring 30 simple and accessible projects, for even a novice seamstress, “Recycled Chic” will arm you with the techniques, inspiration and confidence to renew your existing clothes and accessories, or alter vintage fashion and fabric to suit your individual…

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Miscarriage, The Ugly Secret We Keep

Yesterday I learned a good friend had a miscarriage, she was 6 months along.

She had intended to surprise me with the news at a Thanksgiving party last week, but it turned out to be on the day she went to the doctor to learn there was no longer a heartbeat.

baby feet image, angel

Thanks to Heather for sharing this image.
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When we spoke I told her I had gone through the same thing, though at 3 1/2 months along.

What hit me was the feeling she of shame she shared, that she had not told me she was pregnant, but she very much needed my support in her grief. The word “selfish” was what came up. How is it selfish to need help when you are grieving?

How is it this loss is something we expect people to not talk about, not mention, not share! This pain, so unique and so acute, and so unmentionable. It is as if you made some ugly mistake and shouldn’t talk about it.

When you have a miscarriage people say stupid, horrible things like “It’s better this way,” “You can always have another one,” and “It was meant to be.” I say bullshit! These are words only people who have never faced this could say! How can you tell a woman whose heart is broken, who chose to share this loss with you at all- that it was meant to be!

Because I have lived this too I was able to ask my friend if she got to hold the baby when it was delivered? If they took pictures (YES I said it took pictures of her baby, who was dead), and if they had a service.

If you have felt this loss, you will understand the acute pain that comes with never holding the baby that lived inside you, never seeing it, having no photos. My one regret is I didn’t get a copy of the ultrasound image of my baby before it was gone.

We went through four miscarriages and have two beautiful sons. When we were finally blessed with our second son (order went like this, one miscarriage, one live birth, three miscarriages, one live birth) I looked at my husband and my best girlfriend and said “I have a baby!” The people in the delivery room, I am sure, thought I was a bit dim, but by then, had been pregnant four times, and only once, had been able to keep and hold my baby.

So for all of you out there who have had a miscarriage, no matter how far along you were, share it. There will be a day and a person in your world who is SO thankful you get it- and maybe we can end the shame and stigma that come with this ugly secret we keep.

Hot Yoga, Humility and Falling On My A@@

Hot Yoga

I love Hot Yoga- I live East of Seattle so this should be no shock. My greatest frustration in living here is spending much of the year cold and wet. Hot Yoga has saved me from doing all my workouts on the treadmill or outside. While I love running outside there are days I crave nothing more than to just feel warm, you know- that lizard lying on a rock warm? Hot Yoga does that for me. It also loosens up my muscles and gets me centered. If you haven’t been- GO!

Humility

Now the thing about where I go for Hot Yoga is the teacher is incredible. Carina Terra of Terra Yoga in Issaquah– has a way of helping you move towards more difficult poses- teaches you some of the balance and invites you to try. It isn’t a competition, she recognized everyone is at a different level, but she always invites you to try. Today, I tried, and surprised myself by doing something- an arm balance I can’t remember the name of- and almost did it, then promptly….

Fell On My A@@!

So while my sweaty fall from the crazy arm balance I have NEVER tried before was not too painful physically, my pride, as always was a little bruised. Thankfully Carina didn’t laugh when I fell and I didn’t take out anyone else on my way down!

Fashion, Fun and Finishing a Marathon

Fashion:I went to the Ruby Room fundraiser on Saturday night, only to find the designer I had just clipped her photo from a magazine because I loved what she was doing and wanted to meet her, featured in the show!

Tina’s Gowns on the Ruby Room Runway

Tina Witherspoon is so talented. Her design concepts are full of whimsy and absolutely feminine! I love her work and all she is doing with using recycled materials. A woman after my heart- I made my first gown recycled gown in 1985- and I am now motivated to step back into designing again- all thanks to Tina Witherspoon and the Ruby Room. http://glamspoon.typepad.com/

You see I used to have a reason to make myself and my friends formal gowns regularly, my husband was in the military and there were one or two formal dress occasions a year and it was heaven for me. I always had a reason to sew. Well, he is no longer in the military and we live in Seattle the town known for its causal attire. However, Prom and homecoming live on as does the fashion scene. So my goal is to get my gowns on the Ruby Room runway for their fundraiser next year.

I will post gown photos as they progress, have a LOT of work to do between now and even the first gown, but putting it down here is exciting.

Fun: Ruby Room Runway- filling my mind with ideas, designs and models…..

Finishing a Marathon:Back in July I put up my goal to run a marathon and I was going to run the Portland Marathon for the Ben Towne foundation. Well, the week before the Portland Marathon I was going online to print up what I needed for the next weekend, only to discover my registration never went through!

At the finish line!

So, I scrambled and found that there was a marathon the next day where I went to school, Bellingham, so I grabbed my kids and we raced to Bellingham, praying the race wasn’t full.

We didn’t know where we would sleep (though we have family and friends we couldn’t reach them before we were on the road North) or if I was even running the race the next day. We got there at 4:30 p.m., registration closing at 6 p.m. and I got registration # 590. I found out later that the marathon was limited to 600 registrants and they filled it- so I was 10 slots from not running. So that was it- I was signed up for the Bellingham Bay Marathon.

We ended up staying with Papa and Wendy, and it was wonderful!

The next day I went down to the race, it was cold waiting and I had what I hoped was all I needed. When I got on the bus to go to the start the song “Fireflies” was playing- this is one of my songs with the boys so it was like a small hello from them. I sat and talked to a nice gal who was working on qualifying for Boston that day.

When we got to the Lummi Community Center I took my time walking around, going to the bathroom, then settled down with a group, on the edge, and listened. Their shirts all read “Marathon Maniacs” and they were amazing. What a fun group to sit by, they were all talking about doing “50 by 50” or how many they had done this year, how many were left in the season and if they were planning on traveling to any. When I shared this was my first run and my story of reorganizing a the last-minute they laughed with me and wished me luck, saying I had chosen a great race anyway, with the prayer ceremony at the start and it wasn’t too big.

The race started, me with my trash bag around my shoulders for warmth I had to ask one of the other trash bag wearing runners what the etiquette was on ditching the bags.. he filled me in he always kept it until a water station- so that’s what I did- what a fun look I had going with it tied around my waist for a mile or two! Anyway I used tights for arm warmers, had my blue hat and my Ben Towne shirt on- I decided at the last-minute not to wear the tutu- though I will next time!

The weather was gorgeous and the run starting along the water was just what I wanted. We met up with the half-marathon runners at our mile 17 and their mile 4- and I promptly lost all the people I had been pacing in the crowd! Lucky for me I was still feeling GREAT. I had done so much reading about mile 20 being a bit of a magic number- where you are going to be hurting or good. I felt wonderful. So the fun part for me, you see I am a middle of the pack runner and most of the time when I run a race I set my pace and stay there. So I rarely pass anyone after the race settles in.

This race was different, as we met the half-marthon group at mile 4, the people who had not trained well were starting to slow down, so those were the ones I met. I got to spend the REST of the RACE PASSING PEOPLE! This, outside of feeling wonderful, was the best part of the race for me!

I ended up coming in at 4:26- faster than I expected- because I had figured I would slow down. I maintained a perfect 10 minute pace for the whole race! I was so blessed and my first race was perfect. The only flaw was I told my mum to meet me at the finish line at 5 hours, and I missed them by finishing early!

I will run another marathon, not sure when, will spend my winter designing, and going to the gym. Next fitness goal is placing in my age group- probably in the Snoqualmie St. Patrick’s Day 5K- hopefully it won’t snow in 2013 for that race like it did this year!